Pop quiz: When’s the last time you read a leadership article that wasn’t about the leader?
Most leadership advice reads like a self-help manual for executives trying to cultivate their “executive presence” or “decision-making prowess”—as if leadership is a solo sport where the goal is to perfect your aura of authority.
Take a quick scroll through any business publication, and you’ll see the usual themes: how to command a room, how to develop a CEO mindset, how to embody the visionary genius of a tech founder. But here’s the thing—none of these articles ask the most important question: What about the team?
No one’s asking whether the people being led are actually thriving, learning, or, I don’t know, slowly losing the will to contribute while their boss optimizes their “leadership presence.” And sure, some of these skills have value. But if leadership advice remains a self-improvement exercise for the boss—rather than guidance on how to develop strong, engaged teams—we’re just creating another generation of leaders who focus on themselves first.
It’s time to flip the script. Leadership isn’t about titles, LinkedIn bios, or how much space you take up in a room. Leadership is about how you support, develop, and create opportunities for others. And the best leadership advice should resonate with everyone—not just those in charge today, but those who will lead tomorrow.
The problem with leader-first thinking
Here’s the real issue: when leadership is all about the leader, it reinforces a distorted power dynamic—one where leadership feels like an elite status rather than a responsibility to others. It gives leaders an inflated sense of self-importance, as if their mere presence is enough to inspire the masses. And that’s how we get organizations that celebrate charismatic, all-knowing, strong leaders… while their teams struggle, disengage, or burn out.
But let’s get real—teams hold the power. Think about it like a sports team: when a team wins a championship, they don’t just congratulate the coach. They celebrate the entire team—because without them, the coach is just another person with a clipboard.
This is where servant leadership gets it right. Unlike the traditional, top-down model where leaders dictate and teams follow, servant leadership flips the hierarchy—prioritizing the growth, well-being, and success of the team over the authority of the leader. The best leaders aren’t at the top of the pyramid; they’re at the bottom, supporting their team and clearing the path for them to succeed.
So what happens when leadership is framed as an individual achievement rather than a team responsibility? Well, we get:
- The mentorship void. Leadership becomes about the leader’s growth, not the team’s. Employees end up executing someone else’s big ideas rather than developing the skills and autonomy to lead themselves.
- Power hoarding. Some leaders get so caught up in being the leader that they can’t let go of decision-making. The result? A team that’s trained to wait for instructions instead of thinking for themselves.
- The leadership echo chamber. When leadership advice is only written for other leaders, it creates a self-congratulatory loop where everyone nods along, reinforcing bad habits instead of challenging them.
So, let’s try something radical: What if leadership wasn’t about how “strong” the leader is, but about how strong the team becomes under their leadership?
What if success wasn’t measured by how confident the leader appears in a keynote, but by how many people on their team feel equipped, empowered, and ready to lead themselves?
A new leadership scorecard
If we really want to gauge effective leadership, we need to stop measuring it by the leader’s personal development journey and start asking better questions:
- Are the people on your team growing in their careers? If your employees are stagnant, maybe you are, too.
- Can your team operate effectively without you? If everything grinds to a halt when you’re on vacation, congratulations—you’re not a great leader. You’re a single point of failure.
- Does your team feel empowered to make decisions? Or do they need your approval for every minor thing because they’ve been conditioned to think they can’t act without your blessing?
- Are you actively developing new leaders? If your biggest achievement is your success, and not the success of others, you’re missing the point.
How to lead like it’s not about you
Shifting from leader-centric leadership (which, yes, is redundant) to mentee-first leadership starts with one fundamental skill: empathy.
If leadership is about guiding and empowering others, then the ability to understand and support people—not just direct them—is what sets great leaders apart. So, yes, develop leadership skills and behaviors, but start with the one that actually makes a difference: empathy. Then, build on it with these essentials:
- Coach, don’t command. Stop trying to be the main character. Instead of issuing directives, ask better questions. Give your team space to figure things out, not just execute orders.
- Delegate like a pro. And no, I don’t mean dumping tasks on people while micromanaging their every move. Delegation means trusting your team to get things done without hovering like an overenthusiastic helicopter parent.
- Make yourself obsolete. A great leader builds a team that doesn’t need them. Not in a “we hate our boss” kind of way, but in a “we’re so well-equipped that we can handle this without you” way.
- Seek feedback from below. If you’re only getting feedback from peers and executives, you’re missing the full picture. Your team probably has thoughts about your leadership—if you’re willing to listen.
- Celebrate team success, not just personal wins. If your biggest accomplishments are always framed around what you did, rather than what your team achieved, it’s time to rethink how you measure success.
Leadership isn’t about you. It never was.
Most leadership advice is focused on how leaders can optimize themselves. But real leadership is about what happens to the people you lead.
If your team isn’t growing, you’re not leading.
If your team can’t function without you, you’re not leading.
If leadership is all about you, you’re not leading.
The best leaders aren’t remembered for how powerful they were. They’re remembered for the people they empowered.
